Film Noir

When The Major Theme Of One’s Life Has Been : ” A Series OF Beyond Unfortunate Events “

Having A Creeper Is Almost Something Normal And Celebratable.

The Whole Neighborhood Has Seen Him, Reported Him And Is Alarmed And Afraid By Him. He Is The Talk Of The Neighborhood. To Me, This Is So Minor As The Creeper Situations I’ve Had Before Were REALLY CREEPY. This One Is An Amateur .. He Just Stands Outside My (It’s Beyond A Window, IT’s A Whole Wall Turned Into Slidable Glass). The Whole Neighborhood Keeps Mentioning That To Me So Tonight I Put Out A Huge Lamp To Assist In The Eradicating My Creeper Effort.

Having A Creeper IS Ok. Least Someone Likes Me ENough To Make An Honest Effort About IT. They Can’t Be That Bad, Believe Me. The Richest Most Polished People Are Often Times Way Creepier Than A Simpleton Standing Outside Your Window. I woke Up RAndomly Really Early As My Huge Lamp Out There Is Lighting Up The Whole Garden. Hoping To Finally See Him, Being The Only One Who Hasn’t When He IS Creeping Up On Me. No Luck. Wonder How I Would Feel. Would I Creep Him Right Back Out. Cos I Can Be Very Ferocious. Unfortunately, IT’s Just Me. If They Were Dangerous They Wouldn’t Simply Creep Up … My Door Is Unlocked 24. I HAve Zero Fears . It’s Just The NEighbors . They Have Fear. Me , Even The Creepiest Men Follow Me Around Underground Europe Metros End Up Walking Away At Some Point.

I Show Them No Fear. It’s For REal. They Don’t Scare Me. I Don’t Know What Would Scare Me. People Are Now Like Oh No You Don’t Know Where You’re Going In A Week ? NO I DON’T . I Never Do! They’re Like : Oh You Don’t Plan ? NO I DON’T . I NEVER DO! Lol .

Just Like On My Last Tennessee TRip … I Knew My So Called Twin Wouldn’t Be At The Station … I Directly Had Someone Show Up For Me From Heaven . There ARe Zero Guarantees In Life! You Just Leave When You’re Told. They Drove Me ARound And Carried My 17 Bags LOL ….. From Hotel To Hotel And Then Drove Me Back From The Country After My So Called Twin VAnished On Me … He Said See You Soon At The Door. I Knew They Were Lying. Do I Ask Questions ?! LOL .. Who Does That ? I Just Take It For Face Value, Feel The Emotions Then Move On!

They Show Up Again …. And I Drive There Again .. And That Time They Just Don’t Show Up Completely … What Do i Do ? I Marry Them On Facebook . Why … ? LOL /// Why Not ? LOL ! I Call Them Out Till The End ! They Think They Have The Upper Hand ? How Can They When I Am Not Scared!

In Every Town There Is One Good Person At LEast. And I Just Travel . Once I Landed In Turkey And Noticed I Forgot To Bring Money With Me. Altogether . Was I Scared . No. Did i Die? Umm. I’m Still Here!

People ARe so Afraid All The Time, Have It All Mapped OUt… For Instance Since High School. My boyfriend Had His Whole Life Mapped Out … What His Major Would Be, Then Where He Would Get His Masters AT … I Had Zero Clues What I Was Doing 5 Minutes From Then And Called Him A Calculator … Then 6 Years After I Got Married In USA And Saw The High School Bf Randomly At A Beach Party Back Home, He Approached Me And Said He Had Checked All His Calculator List Asking Me If I Remembered The Last Point He Had On There . Which I Wasn’t Sure What He Was Saying Until He Went: “Yes. I Even Got The House I Wanted In The U.K’.

Fascinating Really. My Whole Life Has Been A Journey Of’ ‘Winging IT’. I Never Clung Onto Anywhere or One. I Just Go. It’s Nice To Get Flashbacks Of So Many Moments Down So Many Roads. Besides That The Only Certain Thing Is Change. And The Unknown.

NEVER LOOK BACK Is Also Something To Apply .. I Guess ..Just Keep On Keepin’ On .

The Creeper Is Way More Afraid And Probably Just Needs Love And Recognition. Reason Why I Don’t See Them Is I Don’t Feel Endangered. You Have To Understand I Grew Up In The War. With Bombs Everywhere Around ME And Killers With Guns. So Psycho Minds Are Just Another Part Of Life. No They Don’t Scare Me ….

I’ve Married A Mad Man Who Yelled The Loudest At Me 24. Did That Bother Me ? Not The Least Bit. My Whole Neighborhood Would CAll The Cops. Cops Would Show Up Ask Me If I Was Being Abused. I Would Invite Them In For Burgers … LOL

Once, I Had Turned Muslim That Period To Get Some Strength And A Feeling Of Home (With The Hijab On My Head Giving Me An Illusion Of Protection), And As I Was Praying At Some Point, The Husband Got So Fucking Triggered (I Did It ~ 5:55 And We Also Caught 4:44) To Push His Buttons (I Like To Take Tough Cases And Study Them, It’s More Interesting To Me Than Having A Job And Going To The MAll..) He Held My Hijab And Pulled It Hard I Yelled And Cried .. He Sort Of Pushed Me Out The Door Too, And The Neighbor NExt Door Called The Cops … In The Past I Felt More Uneasy When The Cops Came Then When The Mad Artist Was Being Insane. Now I Behave Like The COmmander Of The Cops. LOL. Literally; I Was The Only Cop Around In Tennessee Bus Station, As The Security People Were All Playing Games On Their Phones And Were Out To Lunch.

Humanity Is A Very Funny Playground. Maybe That’s Why I’ve Had The Most Psycho Twin Flame Journey Too … LOL .

Think I Would Get Sad When I Find Out The Truth About The Twin Runner? Not Really, This To Me Seems More Normal Than Some Normal ‘Baby I Love You’ Thing ….

NO Idea, Maybe Soon I Will Shift . IT Would Be Interesting.

Latest News Is They Got Russian F-22 s Over Syria . Again. Wassup Russia ! Hi Anna Karenina … What Happened Now … No Clue … No Big Deal .

The Hotel Desk People In Tennessee Were Trying To Give Me Lessons About How Not To do Things Last Minute .. The Indian Lady Was Alarmed Out Her Head On How i Had No Idea What I Was Doing After Check-Out; I Asked Her For A Cab Number In The Middle Of The Country 10 Minutes Before Check-Out Where Uber Can’t Reach.. she Was Flabbergasted!  I Can’t Learn! I Live Moment To Moment . When The Hour Comes. I Figure Something Out. Period The End ~ On That Episode, The Cab Showed Up, Packed My 17 Bags, Then My Angel Friend From the Bus Station Said They Could Show Up! Lol.. so I Had The Cab Driver Unpack My 17 Bags And Sat on The Sidewalk Waited For The Angel. New Angels Showed Up and Bought Me A Happy Meal from Mc. Dees! LOL!

I Have Lived Way Too Long With Hotel Reality As My Home Since My Former Husband Put Me At The Door Handing Me 200$ One Morning. I Knew My Mission There Was Done Even Though He Tried To Get Me To Move Back, And The Hotel Counter Boy Said: “You Don’t Wanna Go Back.” I Didn’t Know That But Listened. To Me It’s All Good. Wherever I Am. There I Am.

I Have Zero Preferences Or Ego. Since Forev. It’s Just Another Cup Of Tea.

Poor Creeper… Creepin’ Up On Me In Rich People’s Paradise Hiding In The Bushes. I Feel They Might Be Just An Energetic Parasite, Or Conscious Evil. They Won’t Physically Assault Me. I’m Past That This Lifetime. I Literally Never Lock My Door. Who’s Gonna Steal ?

My Eyes Can Scare Off Any Creeper. LOL . 06:06 .

Zen . Is The Way. The Path Of Love. Like Oh, Here’s Another Day. Until This Right Side Blockage Situation Fades And We All Begin Again. But This Reality Is A JOKE. Just A Gold-Rush .. Have An Order Of Gold-Rush Wings At Wild Wings ~ Carousel ..

No Hope . That’s False. Just Faith .

What’s The Worse That Can Happen …

On The Keys Once Some Other Creeper Approached Me At The Ocean, Sunset Hour. I Had Him Guard My Bag As I Went In The Water. Look To My Right As I Get My Hair Wet.. And There’s A Shark Fin. Like Right By My Right Hand. I Had A Flash Of Lightning Through Me And Was Out Of the Water Faster Than One Breathes Their Last Breath. Felt Okay, The Shark Was Just Being Friendly Enough To Get Me To Leave The Creeper And Go Home.

I Am Immune To All.

And It’s Nothing Out Of The Ordinary For Me.

I Have Zero Fears.

What Might Have Happened To My So Called Twin .. They Got Married? Got Kids? What Else Would Be New Under The Sun . Everywhere You Look There You Still Are.

I Used To, As A Child Not Be Able To Understand Whatsoever How The Most Beautiful Women On Earth Could Ever Get Cheated On. It Was Something Beyond My Possible Understanding. Now I Have ZERO Questions. I’m Done.

This Reality Is Hopeless.

The Hope Is Fake.

Love Is All There IS. Doesn’t Need To Look Good. It Just Is Anyway. There’s Your Victory.

Then What. Do I Have Options For Christmas. Seems Like IT. I’m Still Here Though, I Don’t Really Move Until The Last Hour. Unless I Feel It And Now I Feel Nothing Pressing.

Guess I Am . Beyond Enlightened. Beyond Love-Lightened. And It’s Kosher With Me. No Big Deal.

God I Have Some Kava Kava Tea Here Sitting. Smelling Real Horrendous In A Way.

What’s The Plan Today? Ummm Excuse Me?

Ask Tutankhamun.